My Truth

Friday , 16, September 2016 Comments Off on My Truth

Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in.

Some call that labored breathing. I call it, I’m going to go soon. As I hold my mom’s feeble hand, I scan her room and this is what I notice~my aunt, on her cell phone, checking up on her kids and significant other. She’s from New Jersey, ya know. My husband helping our daughter with her homework. Two little cousins, lying on a spare bed, making the most in a hospice care room. My brother and sister discussing funeral arrangements (I think). My brother-in-law working the pain medication “machine.” And, finally, my uncle, speaking in his native tongue to his family (I have no idea what he said).

Two days ago my mom was telling me to let her go. She didn’t want to be a burden anymore. She felt useless. She said she was losing her independence. At first, I thought she was depressed. But, I’m far too familiar with losing your independence. I understood. It sucks!

Everyday she was in that place, she had at least five visitors. I could just hear her,”Could y’all just leave~so I can die in peace!” (she’s not even southern) The ironic thing is she passed on 9/6~ALONE. She got her wish.

Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in.